So a little glimpse into what I've been going through the last month or so.
A month or two ago I had my first episode. I was sitting in math and suddenly my side hurt, my body started to tingle and I felt nauseous. I went to the nurse and they told me to lay down and if I didn't feel better in 10 minutes to call my mom. After laying there for a few minutes I felt better and went to class. I forgot about this day until I was walking into Spanish about 3 weeks later and my body started to tingle again and a wave a nausea fled over me. I told my mom and we called my aunt, a nurse. She figured since my episodes were so far apart it was probably nothing.
I forgot all about my episodes until last Wednesday at the end of 5th period I felt nauseous again, my body started to tingle and my limbs felt weak. As soon as the bell rang a few seconds later I felt better, but scared I went to the nurse and went home. It was then that my mom looked up the symptoms for panic attacks. My symptoms fit exactly. I figured the next day wouldn't be so bad. I walked into math and felt a bit nauseous most of the time, but overall I felt okay. Then I got into social studies and while taking notes the nausea came back and so did the tingling. I went to the bathroom and started to cry. I texted my mom to come pick me up. I didn't go to school at all Friday.
I used to be able to count my attacks, but now I've lost count. I have I'd say 3-6 a day, with many mini ones not included.
Today I had my longest episode ever in QFC. It lasted the whole time we were in there. I lost track of the minutes. It felt like forever. Every time I felt better the tingling would come back and I had to try and focus on not throwing up or falling over from my weak knees. I got over it once we got home, but not until then.
So if you see me at school I may be actually having an attack, generally you can tell if I'm not really focusing and breathing deeply. Mostly though you can't tell. Usually the only thing you can do is offer to hold my hand while it passes, something along those lines, or just ignore me all together unless I ask for help. Whatever you do, don't tell me nothing is wrong or just calm down. I know nothing is wrong and if I could just calm down I would.
I have yet to figure out the trigger of the attacks, at the moment they seem to be random.
Thanks for listening. I want to explain this as little as possible, talking about it sometimes brings on some anxiety for me.
Love you all,
~MG
