Don't get me wrong, I love being alone. I need the time to recover and replenish my energy, but sometimes too much alone time can do the opposite. As someone who fights both anxiety and depression time alone with my thoughts I sometimes the worst thing I can do. So I try and distract myself, spending hours getting ready and putting on makeup even if I'm not going out of the house except to get the mail. I try and focus on a television show or book, right now Vampire Diaries and The Heir by Kierra Cass, but sometimes that doesn't cut it. Sometimes all I want is to be reminded of how much I am still needed and wanted in this crazy world. I have been blessed to meet so many amazing people in my life, including my family. I honestly wouldn't be here without them. I would never had left the house and started learning how to control my anxiety. I would never have travelled to Mexico to build houses with some of the most inspiring people I know.
My head is constantly at war with itself that sometimes all I want to do is sleep and wake up when everything is better, when I have everything figured out. Lately I've realized that wishing away my problems doesn't do anything, I have to learn to adapt and surround myself with situations that challenge me and peor that love me. That's the only way I've found to survive this crazy world, to rely on love, faith, and just a little bit of wonder for the things in life that are way beyond us ever being able to comprehend.
I leave you with this bible verse that helps me when I'm feeling anxious or depressed. Have a wonderful school year!
~MG
